Poetry in Motion Mondays: Pretend to Believe

Pretend to Believe

It seems as though just yesterday
I looked into your eyes
And said yes
How can such a simple thing
Be so significant
How can it change the course?
And now I’m lost

How did we get here?
Two worlds collided
Then forced apart like magnets
Simply trying to be
But, not being at all
Trying to figure out what happened
I need to find my way

It shines and glitters
On the surface, but inside
Like ice in my veins
The words I want to say
Corroded and vanished
Together, yet alone
No time to stop the fall

I’ve had my doubts and you’ve shown yours
How do I trust what I can’t believe?
My intentions were never dishonest
But, I think I’ve been destined to leave

What used to come so easily
Is now painful and unwieldy
I struggle to love
What before I could not look away
Something in me
Makes me want to go
This thing has tied me down

I’m tired and I’ve tried
Said I knew everything
So why am I fighting
I can’t make myself believe
It makes no sense
Struggling against the current
The way it should be

I can’t carry you
And hold my head above water
I’m too weak
Why can’t you see this?
For far too long I’d drown to believe
Tried to see the unseen
Something that just isn’t there

I’ve had my doubts and you’ve shown yours
How do I trust what I can’t believe?
My intentions were never dishonest
But, I think I’ve been destined to leave

A thin line traces around
And cuts off
My pain just won’t seem to end
Distractions and attractions
Become routine and weak
While simple things
Aren’t so simple any more

You can’t even imagine
(Maybe that’s the problem)
What it’s like to be
Holding the fate
Looking through the lens
The alpha and omega
How did this become my place?

I’m not as strong
As you think me to be
I can’t continue to pretend
That this is what I wanted
It’s not my plan
I didn’t mean…
And I just can’t…

I’ve had my doubts and you’ve shown yours
How do I trust what I just can’t believe?
Know that my intentions were never dishonest
But, I think I’ve always been destined to leave

About Elizabeth Kennedy

I’m mom and the other half of dads-deals. I am also the proud mother to 2 beautiful little snuggle bugs: a 6 year old and a newborn. I like to challenge myself and will often do something on a whim. I hope to share these experiences with you. Another thing that I hope to share with you all are the challenges and rewards of balancing working a full-time job and making time to be with and enjoy my amazing little family.

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